Breaking Generational Habits and Thoughts, one step at a time.
Breaking Generational Habits is a biggie. But you don't know until you know.....I am my own greatest project.
But unlearning the generational habits that kept me trapped wasn’t something I could simply switch off. It's ingrained, like learning to stop at a red light and go on green. Imagine they changed that rule—now you’re supposed to go on red and stop on green. That’s how deeply the conditioning runs.
I grew up with societal teachings on how women should behave—find a good man, stay fit, look the part. And if you’re alone, society asks, "What’s wrong with you?" There's a constant pressure to fix things, even people, but I’ve learned the hard way that you cannot fix someone who doesn’t want to be fixed, and trying to do so can ruin your life.
When I lost my job, I went through what they call a “fight or flight” response. It was a traumatic period that forced me to face myself, to dig deeper into mindset work and therapy. I did things I never thought I could do, pushed myself, and learned my strengths. I even joined RTT and mindset groups where I met some amazing, beautiful souls. I was proud of my growth, but still, something was missing.
Then, years later, something else happened that shook me to my core. I thought I was prepared, having all the tools I had learned, but fight or flight returned. It came back hard, and I couldn’t control it this time. I felt that same doomed feeling again, trying desperately to hold onto things and people I should have let go of long ago. It took me two years of deliberate action to realize that generational habits and thoughts were at the root of my struggle.
We know the sayings—"rejection is redirection" or "things happen for a reason"—but those sayings are just words until you truly learn to love yourself. Until you step out and face the things that scare you, nothing really changes. You must take action, and that action will always make you uncomfortable. And trust me, I am still uncomfortable. That’s why I often hide when I’m learning—it’s not depression; it’s the discomfort of growth and the fear of facing it head-on.
I owe myself an apology for all the years I kept quiet to keep the peace, for choosing everyone else first, and for not knowing how to love myself. I’ve always given my all to the people I love, but never to myself. And now, I ask myself—why? I now realize I can't fix things I didn't break, yet I exhausted myself trying.
OWE MYSELF AN APOLOGY
For all the times I tore myself down,
For the self-sabotage I allowed to take root,
For giving endlessly without ever stopping to care for myself.
I OWE MYSELF FORGIVENESS
For fighting battles that were never mine to fight,
For neglecting to love myself as I should have,
For believing my only value was in what I could give others.
I forgive myself for carrying burdens that were never mine and for withholding the love I deserved. Most of all, I forgive myself for not realizing that I was never broken — I was always worthy of love, respect, and value.